By Angela E. Pometto
Herald Staff Writer
(From the issue of 10/21/04)

"My wife recruited me from heaven," said Father Jack Fullen.

A priest from the Archdiocese of Baltimore, Father Fullen was ordained in 1995. Married for 24 years and father of three children, his path to the priesthood began when his wife died.

When asked why he wanted to become a priest, Father Fullen responds: "What’s this ‘wanna be’ stuff?" Being a priest or being a husband, it’s all about doing what God wants, not what "I" want, he said.

Father Fullen, now retired and living in Fairfax, met his wife, Sandy, at the University of Bridgeport in Connecticut. They dated for about a year and were married on Sept. 1, 1962.

At the time, Sandy was not Catholic, and while Father Fullen served in the Marine Corps, he drifted away from the faith. After 11 years of marriage, Sandy converted to Catholicism and was instrumental in bringing her husband back with her. Sandy also raised their three children Catholic.

After her conversion, Sandy worked in the vocations office in the Arlington Diocese as the director of women religious. After the kids grew up, the Fullens began taking classes at the John Paul II Institute while it was still based in Rome. During this time, their strong prayer life made their daily paths evident — both in the Church and in marriage.

The couple felt called and became involved with Marriage Encounter, both locally, at St. Ambrose Parish in Annandale, and abroad.

"We always saw marriage as an apostolate of the Church," Father Fullen said. This was evident in their own marriage and in the couples they were serving. They traveled to Africa to begin the program and train couples who would continue the work.

Sandy Fullen died on Oct. 11, 1986. She unexpectedly caught a cold and was unable to recover. They were in Germany at the time.

After his wife died, Father Fullen’s spiritual director encouraged him to go out and date. This helped him decide that he would never marry again.

"Sandy, to me, was more than a companion," he said. "If I had stayed single that would have been fine."

But he was called to something else. When he first decided to look into the priesthood, one of the first things he did was to quit his job. He had been working as an engineer — a profession where everything is concrete — and began taking philosophy classes part time.

"It was so different from what I did in business," he said. "At first, I thought it would be too difficult." The seminary didn’t come easily for him, but it became attractive and interesting.

"I didn’t want to be a priest, but I knew God was calling me," he said.

His three children see their father’s vocation as a great gift and a great cross, Father Fullen said. They do everything they can to support him, though.

"They’re always buying me black stuff," he said. His one married daughter recently adopted a little girl from China, so Father Fullen is now also able to experience the joys of being a grandparent.

"That little stinker has stolen my heart," he said. "As much as she was unwanted by her mother in China, that’s how wanted and important she is in my life."

He knows that his children have learned that "the most critical aspect of life is relationships," he said. "I thank God for the three of them."

Father Fullen compared life to a long corridor where, at certain decisive moments, there are doors. Either the door opens or remains closed. Once a door opens, there is a different path to follow.

It’s not a guessing game, he said, adding that "if I wasn’t meant to be on a certain corridor, it would be explicit."

When speaking with young people discerning vocation, Father Fullen tells them two things: get a spiritual director and develop a solid prayer life, including the sacraments. He also suggests finding a patron saint.

"They are guideposts for us," he said.

In his life, he admitted to have 50-60 patron saints, but for his vocation, he found many parallels between himself and St. Elizabeth Ann Seton. Her husband died in Europe, and his wife died in Europe. After marriage, they were both called to something more. While he was in the process of discernment, he read her biography and asked for her intercession.

Some may say that Father Fullen has experienced the best of both worlds, but when asked about the two different vocations, he emphasizes the similarities.

"In both vocations, you are called to intimacy," he said. In marriage, husband and wife are called first to be in communion with God. Their intimacy with each other is then engulfed by God’s grace, he said.

The same happens in the priesthood. "My relationship with the people I serve comes from the intimacy of my prayer life," he said.

When asked which vocation was "better," Father Fullen replies, "both." It was where God wanted him at that particular time. He does look forward to the time when he can see his wife again.

"The finest moment of my life is seeing the face of God," he said. "And second to that is to see Sandy."