By Angela Pometto
Herald Staff Writer
(From the issue of 7/8/04)

Dressed in purple vestments, a sign of penance and grief, 14 diocesan priests, two deacons and Arlington Bishop Paul S. Loverde came to offer apologies, ask for forgiveness and pray for healing. Gathering on the last day of June, the month dedicated to the Sacred Heart of Jesus, the 50-70 participants were reminded of Christ’s love and mercy in a Mass that initiated the diocesan-wide healing process. The readings and prayers were specially selected from a Mass for forgiveness.

"The Church is the body of Christ. When one suffers, all suffer," read the cantor before the opening song. Those first words set the tone for the Mass.

In the reading, St. Paul’s words take on a strong poignancy with the current issue. "If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. … God … has entrusted the message of reconciliation to us. … Now is the acceptable time. Now is the day of salvation" (2 Cor 5:17-19, 6:2). The Gospel told the familiar tale of a father’s forgiveness — the prodigal son.

"Words are never enough, but sometimes, words are all we have, or, at least sometimes, we must begin with words," Bishop Loverde said in his homily. Three times during the homily he repeated his apology to the victims of sexual abuse and their families.

"I am sorry — profoundly sorry for the terrible pain you have experienced … that you endured such abuse because someone you trusted implicitly betrayed you," he said.

He asked for forgiveness, especially from those who had been abused by a representative of the Church — whether priest, deacon, religious or volunteer. "Forgive us for not acting more responsibly in the face of such abuse. Forgive us for not seeing more deeply and fully the horrendous evil such abuse is and does. Forgive us even as we seek to do all that we can now and in the future to wipe out such terrible sexual abuse of children and young people," Bishop Loverde said. He then explained that he and his staff and advisory boards would be working to implement the bishops’ charter established in 2002.

"To forgive is not to excuse the evil or to pretend that something terribly harmful and wrong did not happen," he said. "Actually, to forgive necessarily implies that something wrong and evil did occur, and in addition, that we are willing to get beyond the pain and the hurt.

"We are gathered here tonight, not only to express our sorrow and our desire to be forgiven, but also to pray with all that is in us for healing for you, victims of child sexual abuse, and for your families," he said. Bishop Loverde alluded to the fact that victims may fall into depression or turn to forms of destructive behavior because of the pain they experienced. "We carry you in our prayers to the Lord and ask Him to heal you as He alone can."

He compared the victims to the younger son in the Gospel reading who reached rock bottom. "We are praying that you will be reconciled to yourself within, to those from whom you have felt estranged through no fault of yours and to our God, who is the father in the parable, full of compassion, mercy and love, who longs for you to be back home, to be rejoined to the family circle, to be reconciled."

Finally, he addressed all who feel unable of forgiving the abusers. Bishop Loverde reminded the crowd that this, too, was a sin. "We are all in need of divine forgiveness. So, in turn, we must be instruments of forgiveness and healing, of new hope and a fresh beginning," he said.

"The heart of Christ is the source of true healing, of enduring hope and of persevering strength. With the transforming grace, which Jesus gives us and through the help provided by competent counseling, we can be open to that healing, which comes straight from the heart of Christ."

The bishop closed by quoting the reading from St. Paul, "We say ‘Forgive me and heal me.’ He replies: ‘In an acceptable time I heard you, and on the day of salvation I helped you.’ And He adds: ‘Working together, then, we appeal to you not to receive the grace of God in vain.’"

The Mass continued in a similarly sorrowful mood. Prayers of the faithful included intentions for the pope and bishops to continue to protect God’s children, for victims of sexual abuse and their families and for the members of the body who have lost faith because of the abusers.

Before Mass ended, Victims Assistance Coordinator Pat Mudd offered her support to those present. "I pledge to do whatever is necessary," she said.

After Mass, there was a reception in Burke Hall with counselors available. Bishop Loverde greeted all who came and spent time with those wishing to talk. Mudd said the greatest asset was that the bishop called the community together to pray. "It is a good beginning to the outreach," she said.

Father Terry Specht, director of the Office of Child Protection and Safety, also thought the Mass went well. "It was an extremely important event," he said. Most victims keep their experiences hidden. When the Church and community come together for this kind of Mass, it gives recognition to their problem. Father Specht believed that the effect would be the same whether one victim or 100 attended the Mass. "I trust the Lord in these things. The people who should be at Mass usually are," he said.

Prayer cards for healing from sexual abuse within the Chruch were available at the reception. On the front is the divine mercy image and on the inside a prayer; bible passages on forgiveness, compassion and love; and instructions on how to apply Christ’s lessons to this issue.

These prayer cards and other counseling services are available through the Office of Child Protection and Victims Assistance. For more information call 703/841-2529 or go to www.arlingtondiocese.org/protect.