By Angela E. Pometto
Herald Staff Writer
(From the issue of 7/15/04)

"The culture puts the interest of adults over children. The shepherd over the sheep," said Jim Towey, director of the Office of Faith-Based and Community Initiatives at the White House. But attendees of the National Association of Catholic Homes and Educators (NACHE) conference were encouraged to be counter-cultural — to be selfless, other-centered and to put children first.

"This bishop is here today to salute you and affirm you for the powerful testimony you give to this world," said Wilmington Bishop Michael Saltarelli. "You live that rejection from society almost every day."

The conference, held last weekend at Mertz Middle School in Manassas, changed its name to welcome all Catholic families, instead of focusing on those who home school.

" home schooling is a gift to families, but it is not for everyone," said Miki Hill, co-president of NACHE. "There are many ways to live out Catholic orthodoxy." The NACHE committee feels that every parent is a home school parent. "Some just supplement with a school," Hill said, adding that all Catholic families have the obligation to raise saintly children. "The call to prayer and apostolic work is for everyone."

NACHE does not want to completely drop their home schooling identity, though. Since these families have different needs, the conference has traditionally been a time to pass on the tricks of the trade. Because the parents are the primary educators, they need certain tools to succeed.

Sessions on how to teach math, latin, writing, grammar and geography remained in the itinerary, and the book and vendor fair offered supplies for being better home school teachers, as well as better parents.

According to Hill, another aspect of the conference is to take time away and reflect. It is often easy to lose perspective, and the conference responds to problematic areas.

"We get in the way of God’s blessings," Hill said. "We examine God’s goodness and our lack of appreciation." Looking at these failings helps parents — if willing to work toward change — return to a balanced, peaceful level.

Ed Mullholland, a philosophy professor from the Legionaries of Christ Seminary in New York, offered a session on moral relativism, defining the term as adult diapers.

"Ninety-nine percent of any magazine is ripe with relativism," Mullholland said. "A fish doesn’t recognize water because he’s swimming in it."

To define culture, he used the example of a doctor taking a throat culture. "A culture is a set of circumstances that maximizes growth of something," he said. "You need to know what you want to grow and how to help it grow."

One of the goals of Catholic family life is to keep the children within a controlled environment. "There are certain things that will not come into my house," Mullholland said.

The speakers at the conference were encouraged to make their lectures practical. Hill hopes that the families leave fortified, refocused and able to make the lessons learned a livable event.

To NACHE, this meant having the sacraments available. Throughout the conference, priests were available for confession, Bishop Saltarelli celebrated Mass on Saturday and Eucharistic adoration immediately followed.

"NACHE serves the Church by giving couples year after year, a place to plug into," Hill said.

Father Kevin C. Rhodes, rector at Mount St. Mary Seminary in Emmitsburg, Md., spoke on how to promote vocations in the family by going beyond the common interpretation that vocation means only to the priesthood or religious life.

"We need to understand that God in His wisdom has a special call for each of us," Father Rhodes said. "Young men and women need to search for personal vocation or they won’t find a call to the priesthood or religious life."

The political keynote speakers offered words to support all families. Towey related several stories about his 12 years working with Blessed Teresa of Calcutta as her legal adviser. He called her the most Mary-like person since the Blessed Mother.

"In the family and married life, the hungry one is not one in Calcutta," he said. Children are thirsting for forgiveness, acceptance and love.

According to Towey, America, in attempting to omit all religious influences, "risks imposing atheism as the public religion."

Towey said that President Bush is someone who is led by God through prayer. "He is trying with all his heart to lead our country in a difficult time," Towey said. "He restored dignity to the White House."

Towey encouraged parents to be good shepherds to their children even against the culture. "Nothing is impossible with God," he said. "Don’t let the culture deaden your hope."

Karen Santorum spoke about her newest book, Everyday Graces: A Child’s Book of Good Manners. The book explores manners and politeness that ultimately are meant to help children reflect Christ.

"You don’t need to look far to realize that courtesy and good manners are lacking in society," she said. "Forty-three percent of teachers spend more time with bad behavior than with teaching."

"There is a need for selflessness in families," said Karen’s husband, Sen. Rick Santorum, R-Pa. He displayed a bracelet with the letters: F.A.M.I.L.Y. "Forget about me, I love you."