By Mike and Kyle Boeglin
Special to the Herald
(From the issue of 2/10/05)

We are the last people who ever thought we would be practicing Natural Family Planning (NFP). But it happened, and because of it, we have been incredibly blessed.

As a socially liberal pair of moderate young Catholics, during most of our engagement we thought we were doing enough for the Church by waiting to have sex until our wedding night. NFP was never an issue because we knew nobody who practiced it, and because we thought that Kyle’s painful cycles were enough of a medical reason to morally justify the use of oral contraceptives (the pill). Besides, nobody, including the priest who married us, ever really explained Church teaching on contraception. Because of this, we didn’t think it was very important — just one of those "old" Catholic rules, like going to confession every week, that nobody followed anymore.

Three weeks before our wedding, however, our thoughts changed. As part of our Church’s marriage prep, we attended monthly talks on topics ranging from finances, to dealing with new in-laws. One particular session was on Natural Family Planning. While the couple patiently, and bravely, explained "Humanae Vitae" (Pope Paul VI’s encyclical on the sanctity of human life and the moral dangers of contraception), and the basics of NFP, what really struck us was their discussion of how the pill, as a back-up method of preventing pregnancy, inhibits the implantation of a fertilized egg. As strong believers that life begins at the moment of conception, this troubled us deeply. Nobody, not even our doctors, had ever explained this to us. Some quick Internet research after the talk confirmed this aspect of the pill to be fact. After prayerfully considering what it would take to learn NFP, our fears about NFP’s effectiveness (what if we end up with 12 kids in nine years?), and our concerns about the return of Kyle’s painful cycles, we ordered The Art of Natural Family Planning off the Internet — just in time to learn the basics of NFP before our wedding.

After 13 months of marriage, we feel that our decision to practice NFP has deeply enriched our relationship. Among our many reasons for feeling so blessed is that because NFP requires active participation by both partners in order to work effectively, our communication is wonderful. Kyle quickly found that a warm heating pad and a husband willing to cook dinner are much better than drugs for relieving painful cycles. Also, by asking ourselves every month if we were ready to be open to life, we found that after a few months we couldn’t really think of a reason not to be. In January we welcomed our first child. This child is a much-loved new soul. We see this pregnancy as a wonderful gift from God.

NFP is a true blessing, not an archaic Church teaching. We could go on about how we feel it’s pro-environment, pro-woman and so socially necessary, but couples will find their own reasons for loving it. We just pray that more people will give it a try.