Receiving the sacrament of penance, or confession, is a common and recommended Lenten spiritual exercise. But for some, it may have been a while since they last stepped into the confessional.
Father William P. Saunders, pastor of St. Agnes Church in Arlington and diocesan episcopal vicar for faith formation; Father Daniel A. Rice, parochial vicar of Holy Family Church in Dale City; and Father Jonathan M. Smith, parochial vicar of Our Lady of Hope Church in Potomac Falls, share their advice on how to make a good — and spiritually fruitful — confession.
Why is confession so important during Lent?
The Catechism of the Catholic Church states, “Christ instituted the sacrament of Penance for all sinful members of the Church: above all for those who, since Baptism, have fallen into grave sin, and have thus lost their baptismal grace and wounded ecclesial communion” (CCC 1446). During the sacrament, the penitent confesses his sins, begs pardon from God, receives a penance from the priest and receives absolution from his sins. Since sin hurts both God and the church, confession reconciles Catholics to God and his church.
The season of Lent is a time to reject sin and worldly distractions, and confession helps us do just that, Father Rice said. “We have all experienced the pain of being alienated from God, from others, from creation and even from our very selves. In Lent, we focus on radically turning away from sin, which is at the root of alienation,” he said.
“While we should be going through a continual conversion throughout the year, Lent is a good time to dig a little deeper, to really examine our lives and our relationships with God and allow the grace of the sacrament to not only forgive us of our sins but to strengthen us in resisting temptation,” Father Smith said.
How often should I go to confession?
The Catechism states that Catholics must confess serious sins at least once per year (CCC 1457). But Father Rice encourages Catholics to receive the sacrament often. “I most often hear the advice of going quarterly (once per season) or monthly. For teenagers and young adults, I recommend at least monthly confession,” he said.
Going to confession monthly “allows us to pause, examine our consciences, hold ourselves accountable for any sin, repent with contrition and receive sacramental absolution,” Father Saunders said. “If we allow time to pass too long between confessions, we could easily become comfortable with sin.”
Catholics should seek confession as soon as possible after committing a mortal sin, “not just because we fear the pains of hell, but because our sins offend God, who deserves nothing but our love and devotion,” Father Smith said.
How do I make an examination of conscience?
Fathers Saunders and Smith recommend that Catholics start with a review of the Ten Commandments. From there, the beatitudes (Mt 5:3-12), the corporal and spiritual works of mercy, and the seven deadly sins. Many parishes offer examination of conscience pamphlets during Lent for children, young people and adults.
During an examination of conscience, Father Rice recommends taking “a couple minutes to invite the Holy Spirit to bring to mind whatever he wants to.”
How do I make a good confession?
During confession, the penitent should begin by expressing contrition and sorrow for sin, Father Saunders said. The penitent should then confess his sins since his last confession, beginning with any mortal sins and then venial sins. “The priest does not need all of the gory details. One should also express how many times a sin was committed,” Father Saunders said.
If you stumble with remembering what to say, ask the priest for help, Father Rice said. “Remember that Jesus wants to forgive you even more than you want forgiveness. Trust in him,” he said.
The priest may give some spiritual advice to the penitent. He will give the penitent a penance to perform, including prayers, a scripture reading or charitable work. The penitent will then pray the Act of Contrition before the priest says the prayer of absolution.
“When we hear the words of absolution pronounced by the priest, we hear Jesus, and we know without doubt, we have been forgiven. The penance — which may include prayers or good works — helps to heal the hurts caused by our sins and strengthen us to do better,” Father Saunders said.
What is the remission of sins during Mass and absolution in confession?
During the Penitential Act (“Lord have mercy, Christ have mercy, Lord have mercy”) at the beginning of Mass, the faithful acknowledge their sins, Father Smith said. “The priest then gives absolution, which is not the sacramental absolution we receive in reconciliation. Mortal sins committed after baptism can only be forgiven in the sacrament of penance. However, venial sins can be forgiven through our worthy reception of Holy Communion at Mass,” he said.
Do priests judge me for my sins?
Some Catholics may avoid the confessional for fear of judgment from a priest. This fear could not be further from the truth, Father Rice said. “I leave with a higher opinion of those who confess, not a lesser opinion. Going to confession shows courage, perseverance and a desire to return to the Father,” he said.
“Like a good doctor, (the priest) wants to help a person ‘get well’ spiritually. Priests rejoice when someone, who has been away for a long time, is truly repentant, seeks forgiveness, and wants to return to the love of the Lord and his church,” Father Saunders said.
Father Smith said that his ordination transformed his view of confession. “After a few days of hearing confessions after I was ordained, I laughed at myself for ever having any fear of going to confessions or fear that the priest would judge me. I’m just so happy that people go to confession, and I consider it such an amazing privilege to stand in the person of Christ to be his instrument of reconciliation.”
What is scrupulosity?
“Scrupulosity is the belief that you’re always sinning no matter what, especially mortal sin, and that if you don’t confess everything exactly right, then it won’t be forgiven,” said Father Smith.
Catholics suffering from scrupulosity may feel the need to constantly go to confession. In certain cases, scrupulosity may be a symptom of obsessive-compulsive disorder. “If someone is scrupulous, then they should deliberately resist the idea that God is an accountant and that he expects them to remember every little detail. God is not out to get us. He is a loving Father who wants to embrace us,” he said.
Turning to the intercession of the saints can be a good consolation, Father Rice said. “Remember that Christ loves you with his whole heart,” he said. “Pray to be delivered from scrupulosity, perhaps by asking St. Thérèse of Lisieux for help, reading her Story of a Soul, or reciting the Litany of Trust.” he said.
To learn more
For several examinations of conscience, go to bit.ly/43iMYTv.
For more resources on making a good confession, go to bit.ly/48RniyE.
