Sylvia Bibby sits in her cozy living room on Caroline Street in
Fredericksburg where she lives with Norman, her husband of 62 years. Surrounded
by the artwork of their two grown daughters, the 82-year-old’s thoughts soar
miles away to the turquoise waters of the Caribbean — the place where she
received God’s gift of faith.
Born in Bolton, England, in 1937, Sylvia was baptized, educated
and married in the Church of England.
“The church was the center of my social life,” said Sylvia, “But
like many people, you start to think that you can do without religion and
church.”
A work opportunity for Norman sent the newlyweds to Jamaica in
1959. There they lived, worked and raised their two girls, but also drifted
away from attending church until they stopped altogether. They returned to
England in 1964, only to find that they felt more at home in the Islands. After
three years, they decided to return but this time to St. Croix in the U.S.
Virgin Islands. Norman was the production manager at St. Croix Alumina Company
while Sylvia was the head of a private school.
Charismatic Caribbean
According to Sylvia, their homecoming to the Caribbean in 1967
corresponded with the arrival of the Catholic Charismatic Renewal. The West
Indian Catholic congregations were on fire with the spirit, she said. It was something
she experienced firsthand when she was invited by a Catholic friend to attend
Mass at St. Ann Church in Kingshill.
Initially, Sylvia was reluctant to accept the invitation since
she had been raised in a society that did not mix with Catholics. But she
wasn’t in England anymore, so she went to please her friend.
“I was profoundly touched and moved by the experience,” said Sylvia.
She left St. Ann feeling that something had happened to her, that she was
changed.
Unfortunately, she didn’t have much time to think about this
transformation since a physical change was on the horizon — debilitating back
pain. For 17 months she spent most of her time staring at the ceiling trying to
lay perfectly still to avoid pain. In the midst of tropical beauty, she was
drowning in despair until one day it became too much.
“I felt like I was going backward down a tunnel,” said Sylvia.
She called out into the empty house, “God, if you are there please help me. I
feel like I’m dying.”
There was no reply and her pain did not cease, but she believes
that her whole life unfolded in a different direction from that moment.
Within an hour she received two calls. One was from her daughter
in England. The other from a friend who knew of an orthopedic surgeon from
Chicago who was vacationing in St. Croix.
“He was also an osteopath,” said Sylvia. “One of the rare ones
who combine both. He came once a day for a month to help me.” As she improved,
she vowed that if she ever recovered she would return to St. Ann Church to
address the spiritual change in her. She made good on that vow as soon as she
could stand.
Through more amazing events that followed, Sylvia realized she
wanted to become a Catholic. The 40-year-old began instruction and entered the
Catholic Church Dec. 2, 1977.
“When I told my parents, I was kind of worried what they would
say,” said Sylvia. She was shocked to hear her father’s response. “My father
said, ‘It’s in the blood.’ ” He explained that he had been born Catholic but
was raised in the Church of England after his father died and his mother
remarried in the Church of England.
“That is when it went out of our lives,” said Sylvia. “So I
became a Catholic and it has been just the greatest gift in my life. I just
love it.”
Giving back with the gift of faith
For the next 16 years, Sylvia took her gift and dove heart and
soul into her new church, on fire with the Spirit.
“The West Indian congregation worships so powerfully, and they
are unhappy if the sermon is less than 45 minutes,” said Sylvia.
She was called to serve the church in many ways. Using her music
background she played the organ and piano while also organizing the music
ministry that included both a youth and women’s choir. She was also part of a
more than 600-member prayer group that met weekly, and she served as a leader
at charismatic conferences throughout the Caribbean.
In 1984, Sylvia and her husband left St. Croix for Texas. By this
time, Norman had entered the Catholic Church as had their two daughters. Sylvia
and Norman became involved in parish life at St. John the Baptist Church in
Alvin, Texas.
At the request of the priest, they started a prayer group for the
Hispanic population and Sylvia once again stepped in to help direct the music
for the Spanish-language Mass. They prayed together, visited nursing homes and
were about to start a ministry to visit the imprisoned when it was time to
leave Texas for Virginia because of Norman’s job.
They arrived in Fredericksburg in 1986 and were parishioners at
St. Patrick Church in Spotsylvania County before moving within the boundaries
of St. Mary the Immaculate Conception Church. At both parishes, Sylvia was
involved in leading prayer groups and many other ministries. She particularly
enjoyed the opportunity to lead spiritual weekend retreats at the St. Francis
Retreat Center in Spotsylvania, working with groups of 10 to 12 men at a time.
Most of the men were in recovery, had just gotten out of prison or were in and
out of homeless shelters in Washington. She led them in prayer, encouraged them
to talk about their experiences and tried to help them realize that change was
possible.
“I loved this ministry,” said Sylvia. “I left it up to God to see
where he would take us. To see what God did during those days was truly a
miracle every time.”
During her 15 years in the ministry, she led retreats for more
than 600 men.
These days Sylvia admits that she can’t run around as much as she
used to but she has no complaints.
“I’m grateful to God for the things he has given me to do sitting
down,” said Sylvia. She has become an avid writer and writes daily in her
living room about her journey and many spiritual reflections. She is still an
active prayer warrior and spends many hours on the phone praying with others
through rough moments. One of her particular intentions is to pray for those in
her family who, like her past self, find themselves trying to go through life
without the assistance of God and the church.
“When you are trying to do it on your own, it doesn't work. You
know there is a hole in you that needs to be filled so you are looking to fill
it somewhere,” said Sylvia. “I look back now and I thank God that he didn’t let
me get lost for good.”
Kassock is a freelance writer in
Fredericksburg.