Humidity hangs heavy today and the temperature has crept
toward 90; it's undeniably feeling like summer in Virginia.
As I sit with a calendar that has palpably shifted from the
frenetic end-of-school-year busyness to a more sanguine,
relaxed busyness, I'm making a promise to myself. Summer will
be for self-care.
Summer will be for strengthening the habit of entering into
God's rest.
It is said that it takes 21 days to form a habit. My
experience has been that the best habits take considerably
longer. Some studies have confirmed it takes 66 days for
behaviors to become as much of a habit as they were going to
become. And those are habits like exercising every day or
giving up a daily muffin with one's coffee. Resting in God
isn't like giving up smoking. Resting in God is a
re-alignment of a life.
In the pursuit of caring for our families - whether by
earning an income or running a carpool - often we fail to
care for ourselves. We martyr ourselves on the altars of
professional advancement or pleasing others or both. We
sacrifice sleep, eat on the run, write way too many things
into a calendar square, or neglect the true needs for margin
in our lives. In bowing to the urgent, we fail to breathe
deeply of God's grace and see clearly His intention for our
lives. Often, self-neglect is slow-creeping and insidious; it
begins as dying to self in order to serve others in a
vocation. It becomes burnout because we have failed to
understand how much we are valued by God and how we actually
are called to live in His gentle care and accept His rest -
not to power up again and again under our strength and derive
the meaning in our lives from the productivity of our lives.
Our work doesn't define us. Our output doesn't define us. Our
bottom line doesn't define us. Our homemaking or childrearing
capability don't define us. Instead, God calls us to work and
asks us to let Him energize it for His glory. Are you feeling
crushed as the school year wraps up and you've jumped through
a million and one hoops? Jesus is calling. He's saying, "Come
to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give
you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am
gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your
souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light" (Mt
11:28-30). If you are bowed down and burned out by the
demands of your life, you're not in His will. Summer is the
perfect time to attend to self-care in order to learn a new
habit of rest in Christ.
Sometimes, I have to be reminded that not every need must be
filled by me. The bone-tired feeling? That soul-crushing
fatigue? Usually they are the symptoms of self-reliance. They
mean I've tried to save the world instead of trusting that
God can accomplish His will in my life and the lives of the
people I love. I take on every need as my personal mission,
and I neglect to seek God's wisdom and direction in filling
the needs around me. I am certain His plan is more prudent
than the full-throttle assault that is my default.
So summer is a perfect time to reconfigure the default. It's
a perfect time to stop worshipping at the altar of
self-reliance. With a little more breathing room and the
opportunity to spend more time outdoors, I'm more likely to
successfully re-calibrate.
Self-care means saying "no" to some people who are very much
in the habit of hearing my "yes," learning that God can step
in and say "yes" instead, and we are all better off for
allowing Him to do so. Self-care means taking the time to
tend the temple of the Holy Spirit. No matter how willing my
own spirit, my body can only be pushed so hard for so long.
It's self-abuse and it's sinful. So, summer is the perfect
opportunity to sleep a little more, to exercise outdoors, to
curl up with a good book, to journal in longhand for a long
time. My brain and my body need time and space to unfurl in
the presence of my Maker.
What things are life-giving for you? Where does God meet you?
Can you put your hand in His this summer and let Him take you
to a place where He fills your depleted soul and nourishes
your tired body?
Foss, whose website is elizabethfoss.com, is a
freelance writer from Northern Virginia.