The Marriage Apostolate at All Saints Church in Manassas
(MAAS) hosted the kick-off of its annual “Date Night” series
Sept. 12 with a talk by Father Juan Puigbó entitled
“What is Marriage?” The talk marked the beginning of the
third year of MAAS’s “Date Nights.”
Every second Saturday of the school year, the group hosts a
free gathering with refreshments, beverages, babysitting and
a talk – thus giving married couples an opportunity to build
community with one another and dive into a deeper
appreciation of marriage.
Father Puigbó, parochial vicar of All Saints and
chaplain of MAAS, has a particular passion for defending
marriage and family life. His talk focused on the nature and
dignity of the vocation of marriage and ways to speak about
marriage in a culture hostile to the truth.
Father Puigbó explained how God constituted the
relationship between Adam and Eve and their complementarity
in the book of Genesis. He said that “one of the most
beautiful” parts of marriage is the spouses’ “ability to help
each other go to heaven” – even though, Father Puigbó
noted, many people are too “impatient” to think in these
ultimate terms.
The talk also covered the sacred, God-ordained meaning of the
marital act. “We are sometimes too afraid to talk about sex,”
he said, “because of how other people have manipulated it.”
However, he emphasized, the act of marital union is not only
good, but holy, made by God, a “power of two human beings
coming together, and able to create a new human being.” In
this way, “sex points to a higher reality … it
surpasses your own identity because you are able to create
another identity.” Father Puigbó went on to note that
self-giving in marital love mirrors the love of Jesus who
gave Himself totally for His bride, the church, on the cross.
Father Puigbó also discussed offenses against the
nature of human sexuality, such as divorce, contraception and
same-sex “marriage.”
“Sex also involves the souls of those two human beings,” he
noted, explaining that is why sexual sins leave wounds that
are very deep: “You cannot use sex for a different reality
than it was created for. … You cannot do to your body
just ‘whatever you want,’ because your body was given to you
to use for its purpose. … Your way of expressing love
affects you.”
Affirming the truth about marriage never means rejecting
people with same-sex attraction, Father Puigbó
emphasized; rather, they must be treated with love as our
brothers and sisters.
“This is about the inner reality of the human being,” he
said. “It’s not just about religion or politics.”
Father Puigbó went on to explain that as temples of
the Holy Spirit, human bodies are places of salvation.
“Salvation happens in our bodies … whatever you do to
your body (affects) your soul,” as in the case of fasting.
Father Puigbó concluded by noting the call of every
human being to heaven.
“We are called to be holy,” he said, “not just because it is
beautiful to say, but because we belong to heaven. …
We need to live this life in awareness of this reality.”
The talk sparked lively discussion both in the
question-and-answer session afterwards, and among couples
mingling after the talk.
“I thought it was very moving to compare the intimacy of a
couple to the intimacy of Christ giving His life for us on
the cross,” said Charles Kapur. “I’d never heard someone make
that comparison before.”
Kapur’s wife, Shalini, agreed, saying the talk really
emphasized the role of holiness in the vocation of marriage.
Other attendees concurred. “The image of sex as holy, of
imaging Christ, was beautiful and not something we hear
ever,” said Stacey Jackson. She added that we often hear a
lot about the “do’s and don’t’s” regarding sex, but the
discussion of its holiness in marriage as a vocation “really
took it to a new level,” she said.
For MAAS, the talk got the new year of “Date Nights” off to a
good start. Typically they have from 30 to 60 attendees.
Saturday night was no exception: Father Kelley Hall was
filled with couples of all ages.
“Our hope is that other parishes will begin marriage
ministries, because there is a tremendous need for it,” said
Kelly McGinn, a MAAS core team member.
Joan Duda, another member of the MAAS core team, said that
the talk was important because it provided “a clarification
of what marriage is, the truth of marriage – and why it is
not what (many people) are calling it.”
Mann is a freelance writer from Northern Virginia.
