How far would you go to get your child the help they need to thrive? Would you relocate to a different city? How about a different state? For a growing number of parents of individuals with special needs, that answer is yes, and that place in the Diocese of Arlington.
More than 220 people attended this year’s “From Inclusion to Belonging — Disabilities Conference.” The event, presented by the diocese and Porto Charities, was held at Saint John Paul the Great Catholic High School in Potomac Shores. Many of those in attendance were local parents and educators, but according to organizers, some came from out of state and one individual came from Australia for the conference.
Gene and Katie Smith have attended the conference for the past two years. Just over a year and a half ago, they made the decision to relocate their family of six to Virginia from California when they discovered the inclusive efforts of Porto Charities and Bishop Michael F. Burbidge.
“We wanted our son, who has Down syndrome, to go to Catholic school,” Katie said, but their previous diocese would not allow it. “Now our son is going to start kindergarten at the same Catholic school as our girls. In fact, the principal is here today to attend the conference.”
Bishop Burbidge opened the conference with a virtual prayer service and thanked everyone for their commitment to inclusion.
“Some may think that when we speak about celebrating God’s gift of human life it applies only to the unborn and the elderly, which it certainly does. But isn’t it true that we also celebrate life at every stage, every person, especially our brothers and sisters with disabilities, who are a true blessing for each one of us?” asked Burbidge. “The theme for this year’s conference is ‘Build a Beautiful Life,’ which is exactly what our friends and family members with disabilities remind us of, not only by their lives, but by their faithful witness.”
The keynote presentation involved a conversation with Mark Bradford, the Word on Fire Institute’s fellow for Persons with Intellectual and Developmental Disabilities, and Melondy Escobar, an associate research scientist at Baylor Collaborative on Faith and Disability, with Porto Charities Outreach Coordinator Carmen Chiappetta.
The daylong event featured more than 20 breakout sessions with different tracks for families, educators, parishes and special needs individuals. The sessions ranged from using educational AI tools and in-classroom strategies to sessions focused on future financial planning for families.
Joseph Fitzgerlad has been the legal guardian of his sister with special needs since he was 24. He led a session discussing transitioning from parent to sibling care. He encouraged parents not to be afraid to discuss and prepare for the transition early, regardless of whether the sibling will be caring for their disabled sibling in their own home or through a group home agency situation, which is his experience.
The information in the sessions and the networking with other parents were invaluable to participants who are trying to stay one step ahead.
“I would like to take all of this home with us to Vermont,” said Elline Haupt, who attended with her husband and her daughter, Sadie, who has Down syndrome. “We just do not have the population base up there and limited funds in the diocese. Learning what parishes can do has been helpful. They mentioned having small groups and finding other Catholics. That is something I have thought of, but it was nice to hear that it does work.”
“I think the speakers were fantastic,” said Gene Smith, who plans to attend every year with his family, “For a lot of the financial things, different things apply at different ages. So, you hear 500 things that you are supposed to do, but you have to take the 15 that you can do right now. The conference helps you stay on task and have the resources to know what’s available because tax laws and savings abilities are changing, so that’s good.”
Julia Melton attended the conference with her husband and 7-year-old son. She found it helpful to know that within the diocese and the structure of the church, they are making ways to be inclusive, not just for parents with children with disabilities, but for adults with disabilities as well.
“It is radically different than the church I grew up in,” she said. Melton, who left the Catholic faith in 2011 but returned this past Christmas, said her family had been attending a non-denominational church whose solution for dealing with her son was to put the family in a room with a TV away from the congregation. When they decided to attend a Mass at St. Jude Church in Fredericksburg, she was shocked when her son, who has trouble sitting still, stayed attentive throughout the whole Mass. Her son attends a private day school and after attending some of the different educational sessions at the convention, she feels she is better equipped to advocate on his behalf.
One of the new additions to this year’s conference was an art show that built on the event’s theme of beauty.
“The idea for the art show came from the fact that some of our young adults with disabilities are amazing creators,” said Chiappetta. “We have one young man who has autism and significant challenges, but he makes beautiful art, so we wanted to showcase that.” They also invited students from Catholic schools to create art pieces in response to the prompt “What is belonging in the Body of Christ.”
“I feel like the conference is very needed,” said Guadalupe Williamson, communications coordinator for Porto Charities. “There was really nowhere people could come and spend the day learning. It can get overwhelming for parents, so it is good to finally have something where you get to meet other families. You have resources and vendors here. It’s great to have the opportunity to see that all in one place and of course it’s fantastic that the diocese is really pushing for this. It makes us feel like our families are seen and are important.”
Kassock is a freelance writer in Fredericksburg.
