When people hear that Frances and Vincent Vaccaro have three sons who are priests, they might wonder how the parents “did it,” and assume they must be super-saints.
“They might – however, they’re wrong,” said Frances, a long-time parishioner of St. Michael Church in Annandale. “It’s all in the hands of God. I would be presumptuous to say it was my doing.”
The Vaccaros have been married 51 years and raised seven children. Their oldest son, Father Brian Vaccaro, 46, was ordained a Redemptorist priest in Washington in July. Two other sons are priests in the Arlington diocese: Father Christopher T. Vaccaro, 44, is chaplain and director of Catholic campus ministry at the University of Mary Washington in Fredericksburg and Father Stephen M. Vaccaro, 34, is parochial vicar of Sacred Heart of Jesus Church in Winchester.
While priestly vocations are from God, the brothers all say their parents’ influence was important, though they never pushed their sons toward becoming priests. “They laid the foundation in how they raised my brothers and sisters — who are all still practicing the faith,” Father Brian said.
While the diocese has a few two-priest families, three is a little more unusual, according to the diocesan Office of Vocations. And families do play a role, said Anne-Marie Minnis, coordinator of events and communications for the vocations office. She noted it’s been said that “Vocations grow on family trees.”
Other priest-brothers in the diocese include Fathers Will and Nicholas Schierer of St. Patrick Church in Fredericksburg and St. Rita Church in Alexandria; and Fathers Marcus and Christopher Pollard, of Christendom College in Front Royal and St. John the Beloved Church in McLean. Father Noah Morey, chaplain at Bishop Ireton High School in Alexandria, has a brother who’s a Benedictine priest in Oklahoma and a sister who’s a Carmelite nun in Idaho. Several other priests in the diocese have sisters and other relatives in religious life as well, Minnis said.
“Our diocese is blessed to have families who strive to be faithful, who pray together, who value the sacraments and who pass that on to their children,” said Father Michael C. Isenberg, diocesan vocations director. “It’s only natural that we are in turn blessed with many vocations to the priesthood and religious life.”
The three Fathers Vaccaro said they grew up knowing their parents took the faith seriously; the family went to Mass and their parents were involved at the parish as catechists and in other roles. But “I don’t think our family was uniquely devout,” said Father Stephen, the youngest.
“It’s not like we were at church all the time,” agreed Father Christopher, the second oldest brother and the first to become a priest.
“A lot of people assume we were a family going to holy hours and doing the rosary every night,” but that’s not true, added Father Brian. More meaningful to him as a youngster, he said, was that both of his parents “knew the faith and we would talk about it,” not just on Sundays, but at the dinner table and throughout the week. “I think it was just knowing that I could get an answer if a question or an issue came up.”
The brothers were altar servers, and attended St. Michael School, where they had opportunities to get to know the priests “as real people” who would come out onto the playground, turning jump ropes and talking with students. “They were so human and approachable,” Frances said, adding that the family would occasionally invite the priests to dinner.
Father Christopher notes that while he and his brothers all felt called to the priesthood, each has a slightly different “charism,” which he describes as “a gift of the spirit that drives you in a different way.”
“My charism has always been working with young adults,” which drew him to campus ministry, he said, while his older brother, Brian, “has always been drawn to service to the poor,” which led him after a long discernment to the Redemptorists, a religious order that takes a vow of poverty and serves in 82 countries. His youngest brother, Stephen, “has a joyful personality” that drew him to working in parishes with families.
“We all have niches and specific things we’ve been attracted to,” he said.
Miller can be reached at [email protected] or Twitter @LMillerACH.
