“Do not let your children do anything that makes you dislike
them.”
This was the line I happened to flip open to in Dr. Jordan
Peterson’s 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos
at a bookstore recently.
“Every parent,” I read on, “needs to learn to tolerate the
momentary anger or even hatred directed towards them by their children, after
necessary corrective action has been taken, as the capacity of children to
perceive or care about long-term consequences is very limited.”
With five kids I am always seconds away from being the object of
anger or hatred, so these words functioned for me — right there under the
fluorescent lights in a suburban bookstore aisle — as a kind of soothing balm
or drug. In a trance-like state I proceeded to the cash register.
Three days and 350 pages later, I had gleaned some new parenting
wisdom and more surprisingly, some ideas for faith in the public square — call
it 3 Rules for Evangelists.
But first to be clear, 12 Rules is categorized
as “psychology — self-help,” not theology. Though Jesus’ words season the book,
12 Rules pushes no faith perspective. Los Angeles
Auxiliary Bishop Robert Barron notes that it is “chockablock” with “wise
insights,” yet cautions against the wider Jungian perspective to which the book
is related, with a “tendency to read Biblical religion purely psychologically
and philosophically and not at all historically.” “On balance,” he says, “I
like this book and warmly recommend it.”
First: Sort out your rule of life. Each of us needs a rule of
life that guides our daily use of time — from prayer to technology use,
confession and much more. And yet in our relativistic milieu, we seem to
apologize for anything even resembling a Catholic rule, dogma or precept. We
shove them all into the closet, too embarrassed to explain them to guests. Yet
the Peterson phenomenon suggests that millions around us are famished for
precisely such a conversation about rules, limits, delayed gratification,
sacrifice and freedom. “Set your house in perfect order,” Peterson advises,
“before you criticize the world.” Sort out your rule of life, now.
Second: Accept your suffering and imbue it with heroism. “Life is
suffering,” Peterson writes. Instead of hawking a new elixir in our therapeutic
culture, Peterson invites us to reflect deeply on suffering: he uses the word
more than any other in the book. “The person who wishes to alleviate suffering
... ” he writes, “will make the greatest of sacrifices … of everything that is
loved, to live a life aimed at the Good. He will forgo expediency.” 12 Rules pulses with no-nonsense calls to heroically
delay gratification — to “privilege the future over the present.” Evangelists
take heed: scores of people are trying to unlock the meaning of suffering, and
you hold the keys.
Third: Start engaging with questions people actually are asking.
In 2012, Peterson the psychology professor, then the author of one obscure work
on myths, discovered a website called Quora that was inviting responses to this
question: “What are the most valuable things everyone should know?” Readers
anonymously rank their favorite responses, and the 40 brief rules and maxims that
Peterson posted promptly received the most votes. The rest is history. 12 Rules was born. Nota bene
evangelists: Get out, find the nearest commons (actual and maybe even digital),
listen, and start engaging with questions.
After his speaking events, Peterson is approached by individuals —
including many young men — sharing some variation of the story that “I was in a
dark place” and “your online lectures helped me get my life back together.”
Peterson beams as he exclaims, “God! That’s so good! Great!”
There is only one Jordan Peterson, yet you as an evangelist were
sent on a mission to the same cultural and historical moment — with its same
dark places and same raging thirst for encouragement, meaning, and rules.
Peterson the professor formerly was read by the average scholarly journal
audience of 2.6 readers, but he got restless, found Quora and embarked on a
quest.
“Go and announce the Gospel of the Lord,” we hear every Sunday.
If you find yourself stuck in a bubble in which 2.6 people know about the
riches and joy of your faith, perhaps it’s time for you to set out. A lot of
people are waiting for you to buck up, stand up straight with your shoulders
back, and glorify God with your life. If something is holding you back, hear
Peterson and hear him well: “Start to stop doing what you know to be wrong.
Start stopping today.”
Johnson is associate director of the St. Thomas More
Institute.